Does Clothes Really Make The Man?

Does Clothes Really Make The Man? 
By Sharice Harris

              Content makes poor men rich; discontent makes rich men poor.

- Benjamin Franklin 

Years ago on a trip to Burma, something simply extraordinary happened in my life. In the midst of abject poverty, the kind that exists whether there is an economic crisis or not, I experienced a rare phenomenon that many of us in western society deem impossible without money.

Absolute Contentment. 

As I walked through the dirt roads filled with shoddy shacks I couldn’t help but noticing how happy the towns people were who lived there. 

Clothe in plain woven fabrics the men beamed from ear to ear while local women cheerfully shared humorous familiar stories. Although I had grown up in conditions that weren’t far from these back in the U.S., it hit me that I’d never come across poverty stricken people who genuinely seemed contently happy with the cards life had given them. 

Why were these Burmese people so content? According to the news they had absolutely no reason to be this happy. Had they accepted and made peace with their lot in life? Had they given up on the fight for a better life or did they find out something about life that most of us are still searching for? Had they realized the meaning of life? 



Uncovering the Gift of Gratitude in the Midst of Distraction 

In western society we face so many momentarily distractions, many of which block us from realizing that we already have everything we need. According to a study held by PBS the majority of Americans who claim to be ‘very happy’ reached it’s peak in 1957. That same study went on to reveal that our happiness has been on fairly steady decline since 1957. 

However, why would we be so unfulfilled and so unhappy, when according to ‘The Huffington Post’ we are one of the richest countries in the world? Is having more than most people worldwide simply a distraction which keeps us from appreciating all that life, all that this planet has actually gifted us? 

I mean wouldn’t having more naturally constitute as being better? 

Now I know that some of you are going to disagree with me and that’s fine you are entitled to your opinion just as I’m mine. Hey, from my perspective we are all pieces in this puzzle and each one has his or hers perspective for a very specific reason. I talk more about this subject in my book: ‘A Permanent Summer’. 

What I saw, felt and experienced in Burma, was evidence that the more society seems to have the more it’s people to complain. As I watched children curled up and sleeping alongside hard dirt roads with no pillows, sheets or comfy mattresses, I couldn’t help but think about how children back home in the U.S. and Europe would have made an all out fuss over not receiving the latest PS3 or Nintendo Wii for X-mas. 

Why and how could such a tremendous gap of extreme basic human rights and inequality exist on such a small planet? How can we share the same air, share the same basic needs yet overlook the fact that every day we have EXACTLY what it is we need. 

While we complain about the economic crisis, people in Burma and most countries in the world have never ever experienced any type of financial growth. I once heard a Spanish man say to a man from Guyana that Spain was experiencing a ‘crisis’, only to hear the Guyanese man say. Oh really? Then my country has been in a crisis forever. 

According to Global Issues, more than 80% of people worldwide still live in complete abject poverty. They have always been living with less, yet they are happier. 

Perhaps if we could focus on everything that we do have, if we could just make a list of everything, no matter how tiny or miniscule they may seem, then perhaps we could come to the awareness that we really have been incredibly blessed with more than we need. 

In most of western society, no matter which social class we come from, no matter how lowly and hard our past may have been, we can leave those stories in the past and be thankful that we have the opportunity to grow and that we have the opportunity to share that growth with the rest of humanity. 

The economic crisis may have required that we downsize our supersized lifestyles but in the process of it’s occurrence, I’ve personally come to realize that everything that truly matters could never be bought anyway.

5 Ways to Feel More Love & Compassion For Yourself & Others

By Erin Lanahan

“The amount of happiness that you have depends on the amount of freedom you have in your heart.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

Lately I’ve been feeling a sense of vulnerability that I always wished I could feel without being afraid.

I have always wished I was one of those people who could show my authentic self to the world, and still be able to look you in the eye, after I let you see me, without quivering in shame or regret.

Not too long ago, I shared my feelings with someone who I deeply loved. This was one of the hardest, scariest things I’ve ever done, but it gave me the freedom to be vulnerable and to finally have a heart that’s ready to let love in.

Loving this person has taught me so much about love, forgiveness, and acceptance. Although he did not want the same things I want, just having him in my life has taught me more about how to feel unconditional love and genuine compassion for myself.

As a result, I am experiencing a deep level of unconditional love and compassion for others.

I use to walk around taking things very personally.

If I walked by a stranger who gave me a dirty look, or if a bank teller was rude, or if the man I loved didn’t want to love me back in the way I wanted him to, I thought it meant there was something wrong with me. However, what I’m realizing is that none of it has anything to do with me.

I have a brand new sense of awareness now.

When I begin to experience negative self-talk inside of me, I seem to be shifting almost immediately to a place of self-love, forgiveness, acceptance, and compassion for myself. This inner awakening has begun to translate into a new perception of my outside world.

Instead of my usual thoughts and reactions that occur when confronted with less than ideal responses from the external world, I am able to see me in you and you in me.

Right away I begin to feel compassion, because I know you hurt, just like me, and you feel joy, just like me. You worry and feel scared sometimes, just like me. You have bad days, just like me, and you have amazing days, just like me. You are seeking, just like me. You want to believe in love, just like me.

I look at people passing me by in the store, on the streets, or in traffic, and have a deep sense of knowing that they too feel separate sometimes, and they too have times when they fear they will never be enough—just like me.

We all feel the same things.

This realization has allowed me to continue loving even when it isn’t returned to me in the exact way I initially wanted it. True love, after all, is to love someone and expect nothing in return.

I practice this daily by being honest about what’s in my heart, without holding on too tightly to the outcome.

For me, practicing love is the same as practicing the art of letting go, and giving others the freedom to just be—accepting them exactly the way they are. It’s something we can do with friends, family, love interests, and strangers alike.

I can now look this special man in the eyes and smile because I know he is just like me. I know that he can see me now, because I finally revealed myself to him, and I feel good about myself for doing that.

I can accept him and just experience him for who he is and where he is on his path because I know now that we are the same. I know that what will happen, will happen, and what will not, will not.

In the meantime, I continue to make more room inside of my heart to give and receive love.

The simple act of making a shift within has completely transformed the type of relationships I’m attracting. When you live from a place of self love, the world mirrors love and compassion back to you.

When you give yourself unconditional love, compassion, forgiveness, and acceptance, you’re then able to give that to others.

Here are 5 tips to feel more love and compassion for yourself and therefore reflect that back to the world:

1. If you don’t feel real love for yourself yet, act as if.

Act lovingly towards yourself and do things that nurture you, make you stronger, and make you proud of who you are and how you live your life. Exercise, meditation, helping others freely, and eating a healthy diet work really well for me. Practice progress, not perfection.

2. When you feel hurt by someone else, remind yourself that they are just like you.

They hurt, feel fear, have insecurities, and feel the need to defend and protect themselves. They are no different than you and me.

At times, we all react to the programming in our minds. As you commit to feeling unconditional love and compassion for self and others, you will begin to transform the programming in your brain. All you need is awareness. Just be aware.

3. Remember, others are on their path just like you are on yours.

You are both just doing the best you can.

4. Be of service in the world.

Nothing will help you find compassion within yourself and for others like coming face to face with people who have much less materially and way bigger problems than you.

5. Turn within and ask your higher knowing to show you where you lack integrity, love, trust, compassion, forgiveness, and acceptance.

Then ask yourself to heal.

Be patient with the process. Sometimes small shifts happen over time. Allowing your own process to unfold is an act of love in and of itself.